Day 256

I should have stopped at one.

This is worse than a drunk text. This is a drunk blog.

So here I am in an emotional state of panic….walking around the streets of Torrox…this pueblo I want to get out of so bad almost in tears thinking about all the people I won’t ever see again.

I just got chicken at the meatshop. The girl there always knows I want chicken breast. Everytime. I was short .12 she let me slide. That sort of stuff is irreplaceable!!

I passed the gotta be 90 year old woman who used to make passes at my ex with her seductive toothless smile. She was sitting outside, I said hello…we made some chit chat. She tells me, when I was your age I used to go to the fields and pick avocados, and harvest the olive trees…now all I do is sit. I asked her if she was bored,…she said all the time.

The people here are real. I respect that. I like hearing how it is,…even if its about me!

The secretary at school told me my face looked fat a couple a weeks ago. Nobody would tell me that in Wisconsin. Thing is….I took some notice, and guess what, my face is getting fat! I’m getting fat,…and I respect her for telling me so. I’ve gone back to my “evening rumba routines”. So I’m working on it…

Miguel came over to my house tonight. First time. He finished the radio and I offered him some wine. He’s always been real. I’m going to miss him a lot. I never understood why him, or the rest of the people cared so much for this place…

and it took 8 months to find out why.

The apartment is a disaster. I was cleaning and took a 40 min break to take self portraits. Either I’m extremely vain, creative or lazy….one or the other.

Atleast I’m writing this. If I wasn’t distracted I’d surely be in tears by now.

I’ll have to leave and give the keys back, Thursday is going to come to soon.

So now I’m sitting on the miserable library steps…thinking how I will miss their stench and hardness…Maybe I’ll sober up and come back to write a proper post. Or maybe I’ll go finish the Bailey’s at home.

Its really all up in the air.

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